Essay

Social Media Marketing Manifestos and Percocet

By Eric Schiller on November 11th, 2009 1

mmdrugs

With everyone and their dog out writing “revolutionary” manifestos, I thought I would throw something together for the social media crowd.  It is my hope that social media addicts will save some cash on those spendy membership sites that teach you how to turn twitter into some sort of money tree and instead read my manifesto (also I have oceanfront property in the Mojave desert for sale).  Seeing as I’m currently tripping on Percocet as a result of my wisdom teeth getting yanked out,  this post could be divinely inspired and I could be enlightened. Or something.

There Are Marketing Models For a Reason

The social media marketer is a strange breed.  Unlike most entrepreneurs, they build their business in the reverse order than just about every other entrepreneur on the planet.  The proven business process is as follows: 1. find a need out in your society that someone requires filling. 2. Develop a product, service or something else that fulfills this need.  3. Find a way to connect to people in the world that have the need you’ve discovered. 4. Sell your thing to them. 5. Build infrastructure to continually support this need.  This is a process that tends to work and often makes businesses money.

The social media marketer does this roughly in the reverse order: first they build up an infrastructure.  They build a blog, follow spam thousands of people on twitter, desperately seek out well-known blogs to write guest posts for, network with people who are in the same social media strata that they are and so on.  They do this because in social media, being “internet famous” always comes first.  Next, they build a product as fast as they can.  There is little research done on finding legitimate social needs, they just build a product that is usually about 98% redundant with their peers’ products. Since everyone else with 20,000 mutual close-knit followers is building products with minimal market research, so why shouldn’t they?

Third, the social media marketer decides that while 20,000 followers is cool, there isn’t  really a strong connection with any of them, so they will pick a few token followers of theirs to “authentically” mentor.  All in the name of marketing of course. Step four is when they finally discover that it might be worthwhile to build products that people actually need, but by this point they are so hooked on selling $150+ per hour coaching services, that actually writing a full non-fiction length ebook sounds downright tedious.  Instead they write revolutionary manifestos to push their half-baked coaching and membership site services. And so it goes.

The Social Media Marketing Manifesto:

(written under the influence)

1. Get a bunch of people to look like they are following you on a popular but overrated social media website.
2. Use this inflated fame to recruit followers who actually have pulses.
3. Create a “free product” and only let your followers download it under the condition that they submit themselves to your “absolutely free” email list.
4. Create an information product, membership site, or start calling yourself a “life coach” (sorry Duff).
5. Use your “absolutely free” email list to remind your followers with great regularity that you are in fact selling something that they need.
6. Direct them to a persuasive form letter that reminds them of how enlightened your lifestyle is.
7. Profit?

Is this really a great business model people?  I’m on an opiate right now and I can tell you that its bullshit!

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8 responses to “Social Media Marketing Manifestos and Percocet”

  1. Ivy says:

    There are three kinds of ways to make a living: work, sales, and bullshit.

    Work involves creating a product or providing a service. It includes everything from software to pens, legal representation to teaching, art, porn, teaching, writing, building houses, building Websites… all real work.

    Sales involves selling the product or service. It can be honorable (the man in the convenience store) or dishonorable (used car salesman). It can be something you do along with your real work or something you do by itself. As its best it's a skill that connects people to the things they want or need.

    Bullshit is everything else. MLM schemes. Complex currency arbitrage with pretend money. Self-proclaimed experts that do nothing but sell products to become the same kind of self-proclaimed expert. People who sell things that they claim will change you… when the truth is that you have to change yourself (not services to help you change yourself). It's being famous for being infamous. It's reality TV. It's SEO and social networking and personal branding — with no product apart from ego and no purpose aside from money or fame. All bullshit.

  2. Toby says:

    Eric you nailed it with this post! Thanks for your good insights!

  3. […] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Duff McDuffee and Shannon Lynch, Connie L. Schmidt. Connie L. Schmidt said: RT @CCGAL Percocet as a writer's muse? Seems to have worked well here: http://bit.ly/2YNkS4 […]

  4. Gina says:

    Well done!

    While I have a lot of followers (a good portion bots i bet) I have found amazing people (like Duff and oh..Eric!) I would have missed had I followed only "special" people or "friends" . Living on a small island the whole point of social media for me is to feel like I am a little more out in the big world 🙂

    As a Nutritionist I have desired to find clients who need my services (eating disorders nutritional counseling) on the internet as I do most of my work by phone. Yet I have been unable to find a method of marketing that can live with.

    Actually it was easier to support 2 brick and mortar health food stores back east for 12 years with only word of mouth (pre social media days) advertising than it is to find a steady stream of clients for a one gal nutrition show with all this social media at my fingertips.

    I think I'd have a gaggle of interest if I could suck it up to write a "squeeze" page and promise the moon but I don't do well without sleep.

    So I guess I'll just keep on tweeting and blogging and enjoying the ride.

    Eric you are amazing even on pharmys 😉

    Aloha~

  5. Dorsey says:

    Do you write your own article or not, if yes you do know what you’re doing, keep on the great job, oh and you might write some PDFs.

  6. Walker Detar says:

    This is the article that I am looking for. The information I get were really helpful for my research. Thanks for posting a blog like this.

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