As a child, I would frequently bounce my leg, tap on any flat surface, rock back and forth, or otherwise move and shake. While this was a useful way of calming and soothing myself (aka “stimming” as it’s called by those who study Autism Spectrum Disorders, or “nervous twitches” as I usually referred to them), it had the unfortunate consequence of annoying other people and giving me unwanted attention in the form of shaming and public humiliation.

At first I wasn’t even aware that I was engaged in such unconscious behaviors, so I often denied other people’s observations and accusations. When I became aware, I frequently felt embarrassed and resolved to stop such behaviors, but many times couldn’t because I wasn’t aware I was doing it and so I didn’t know how to stop.
(more…)